Empowerment for women - International women's day

Someone suggested that I write something about empowerment for women.

First thing that came into my mind was, why do we condition and limit ourselves as "women" or "men"? Why do we limit ourselves as "women" or "men", and condition ourselves that we should behave, think and express ourselves as "women" or "men", and can only be empowered in certain ways just for "women", or just for "men"?

If we practice Yoga Vedanta teachings about namelessness and formlessness, or non-dualism, or non-separateness, or "all is one", in our everyday life, there will be none or less problems than we think we have now in the world that derives from the perception of separateness due to attachment and wrong identification with the qualities of names and forms.

We can just be "who we are" unconditioned by the different sexual characteristics or physical appearances. We can think or act or express ourselves freely without conditioning ourselves that we can only think or act or express ourselves in certain ways restricted by the different sexual characteristics.

This is not about denying our sexuality as women or men.

We are aware of our physical body having female or male sexual characteristics and it is conditioned to have certain particular functions according to respective genital organs that our body has. But, the capability of our mind to think or to believe, can be free without being restricted by the differences of the sexual aspects and appearances.

We can also be aware of, and be able to accept the fact that there are certain things that the female or male physical body can and cannot perform. Different genital organs have their own duties to be performed or to be carried out.

Other than these restrictions due to having specific genital organs in our physical body influencing the hormonal system as well as our emotions and feelings, we can be free to be "who we are" without being restricted by the different genital organs and physical appearance that generate the qualities of names and forms that categorize us into "women" or "men".

We acknowledge and respect our body as it is, but we do not identify ourselves with the physical body and condition ourselves as "women" or "men", as our true nature is without qualities of names and forms. We are who we are. we are not "women" nor "men". We might recognize or identify ourselves as a species called "human beings", and even this name and form about "being human beings" is not the truth of who we really are.

Once we are free from being conditioned by the differences of qualities of names and forms, we are who we are or what we are. We are not "human beings" nor "non-human beings". We are not "women" nor "men". We are not determined by all these qualities of names and forms. We are not being conditioned by how worldly minds believe how "human beings" should behave, nor how "women" or "men" should behave.

Once we let go of attachment towards the identification of "I am a woman or a man, and I should think, act or behave like what a woman or a man should think, or act, or behave, then naturally we are just who we are". We are free.

Only when we are totally free to be who we are and not being restricted as "women" or "men" or "human beings". The sense of separateness disappears. We do not isolate ourselves from what we think or believe that is different from us, that are not the same species or category like us.

We accept ourselves as we are, without the need of having competition or comparison between "women" and "women", or between "women" and "men".

We start to accept everyone as they are , not because they are "women" and they behave like "women" or "good women", or they are "men" and they behave like "men" or "good men".

We let go of expectation that we, or other people, as "women" or "men", should think, act or behave in certain particular ways according to the type of sexual organs our physical body has.

This allows us to be free to be who we are, not because we are being "human beings", or being "women", or being "men".

And so, there is no difference in terms of how to be truly confident or be truly happy in life between "women" and "men".

If we are ignorant about the truth of who we really are, and condition ourselves or limit ourselves as "this" or "that", then there is no difference between "women" and "men" when the mind is in a state of unhappiness or restlessness due to ignorance. When we are angry, we are the same. When we feel hurt and disappointed, we are the same. When we have fear and worry, we are the same.

We will be conditioned by thinking that we should think, act and express the way that we think or believe what a "good woman" or a "good man" should think, act and express, or else, we are "bad" or "not good" as "women" or "men"...

It doesn't matter whether we are human beings or non-human beings, women or men, young or old, healthy or unhealthy, rich or poor, educated or uneducated, having religion or not, or having different religions and beliefs, or having different cultural backgrounds or languages that we can understand and speak, or having different points of view and different ways of doing things, or having different nationalities, colours of skin, or body shapes, or sexual appearances, or having different lifestyles, personalities or characteristics, when come to being ignorant, we all are the same. When it comes to realizing the truth of things, it is the same. When we are in a state of happiness, or in a state of painful sorrow, it is the same.

By practicing Yoga Vedanta in life, we let go of what our mind is educated or informed about what worldly "success" or "happiness" or "meaningful life" means. We let go of what our mind is conditioned to believe or think what is "good and bad", "positive and negative", "happiness and suffering" etc, as the truth of things is that everything is just what it is. It is not something "good or bad", "positive or negative", "happy or suffering"...

When we realize the truth of things and are able to accept the reality of things as they are, without judging or categorizing them as "good or bad", "positive or negative", "happy or suffering", then we will not be affected, nor influenced, nor determined by the forever changing qualities of names and forms that our mind perceives and experiences from moment to moment, through the senses of what we see, hear, smell, taste, touch and think. We will not generate attachment towards the qualities of names and forms. There is no craving or clinging to what our mind used to believe or perceive as something "good", "positive" or "happy". There is no aversion towards what our mind used to believe or perceive as something "bad", "negative" and "suffering".

This is the state of non-duality, or namelessness and formlessness.

This is because real peace and happiness, or confidence is unconditional or unlimited. It doesn't come from the qualities of names and forms that are conditioned by impermanence, nor determined by the different appearances or conditions of the physical body or the things that we come in contact with.

Real peace and happiness or confidence is not attained from what we think or what we want to believe "success" or "achievement" means. We think that "success" or "achievement" has a similar meaning to peace, happiness and confidence, that if we attain the "achievement" or "success" that we want, we will be peaceful, happy and confident. We are conditioned that when we are able to do what we want to do, go where we want to go, be what we want to be, only then we will be peaceful, happy and confident. Or else, when our wishes or what we want to attain is not gratified, we will be not peaceful, not happy and not confident.

We also have different points of view about what is categorized as "achievement" and what is not. Some people take being successful in relationships as "achievement" in life. Some take being successful in career as "achievement" in life. Some take doing volunteer works as "achievement" in life. Some take accumulating wealth as "achievement" in life. Some take having a happy marriage or happy family as "achievement" in life. Some take having a "beautiful", "healthy", "strong and flexible" body or "fit" body as "achievement" in life... And so on.

There is nothing wrong with setting all these "objects" or "qualities" as goals that we want to achieve in life... But then we will be conditioned and limited by all these names and forms to be happy or not.

If we can let go of the conditioned way of thinking about what we are and how we should think and behave, then our confidence about ourselves will not be determined by nor come from whether we are "women" or "men", whether we are "good" or "not good" according to the standard that we categorize things into "good" and "not good", whether we are "successful" in life or not, or how we look, or what is our worldly image, or how many "achievements" we had attained, or how other people think of us or judge us as "this" or "that"...

We are limited by what our mind wants to believe things are. If we identify with the mind and associate with what our ego likes and doesn't like, then we will be determined by all these conditions that come from our own mind, to be happy or not, to be confident or not.

For example, we are educated, or told, or informed that having fair and smooth skin is "beautiful" in Asia, and if our skin is dark in colour and not smooth, then we are not "beautiful". If we are attached to what "beautiful" means in this commercial world of beauty products, then very naturally we will be attached to the term "beautiful", and want to look and feel "beautiful", then we will be determined by our skin colour and texture to determine whether we are "beautiful" or not. We will have very low self-esteem, be dissatisfied and unhappy if our physical body image and appearance does not fall into the category of being "fit and beautiful".

If we are free from this ignorance about what is "beautiful" and let go of the desire of looking forward to be "beautiful" whether it is to feel good about ourselves, or to get other people's attention, or for other people to like us, or love us, or to get support and acknowledgment from certain people or groups, and to feel confident and meaningful about ourselves, then we will be happy and confident as we are. We accept ourselves as we are, no matter whether we fall into the category of "beautiful" or not according to the worldly standard about qualities for being "beautiful". We don't need to be "beautiful". We are not "beautiful" nor "not beautiful". We are what we are, and we accept and love ourselves as we are.

True confidence is unconditional. When we know this true confidence, we can perform all our duties and responsibilities without fear and worry. We are not determined by "success" or "failure" to be happy or not. We can do our best in whatever we want to do, but without being affected nor determined by the result, or the fruit of our actions.

Real peace, happiness and confidence are not determined by whether we are "successful" in life or not, whether we achieve what we want to achieve or not, whether we can do what we want to do or not, whether we get what we want to get or not, whether we live in "good" conditions or not, whether our relationship with somebody is "good" or not... And so on.

Real peace, happiness and confidence are unconditional and unlimited. By knowing the truth of things and about ourselves we accept and love ourselves and other people as we are, as they are, without expecting ourselves to be what we want us to be, nor expect other people to be what we want them to be.

Be happy.

Additional notes :

Be yourself as you are...
You are naturally beautiful as you are...
Your beauty is beyond the look of the physical appearances...
You don't need to look like anyone else...
Nor do you need to hide your natural beauty with some additional coatings or accessories...

Love yourself by accepting yourself as you are, from within and without...
If you can't even love yourself as you are, then no one else can...

Beauty is beyond names and forms, colours and shapes, words and languages...

You'll see beauty in everyone and everything, when you see it in yourself just as you are...

Happy women's day...  

my daily yoga asana practice - video playlist

This is a sample of my daily yoga asana practice to share with those who want to know what I usually do for my personal asana practice.

Asana practice is an important practice in the path of Yoga to help us in purifying and controlling the mind, to render the mind calm and being at the present, as well as rendering the body strong and flexible preparing for meditation and to perform selfless service.

During the asana practice we learn to let go of judgment, comparison and expectation towards ourselves and other people. We learn to accept the present moment now as it is. We learn to accept ourselves as we are. We learn to accept the reality of the present moment now as it is, not necessary the way that we want it to be or the way that we think it should be.

It will not be the same in every session of asana practice (even if we perform the same asana routine). We learn about impermanence and allow impermanence to happen and accept the impermanence as it is. We learn to accept the ever-changing condition of the body as it is. We learn to let go of craving and aversion. We learn to let go of the ego.

When the body needs rest from the asana practice, I don’t do any asana practice for that time being. But yoga practice is always there continuously, in every moment, never ceased.

Here the asana poses were being held for a shorter period of time during the video recording and the resting time in between the asana poses was being edited for suitable viewing.

In my daily personal practice, it takes about 2 and a half hours to 3 hours to complete one session of asana practice. The asana poses are being held as long as my body feels like holding comfortably. The sun salutation is repeated minimum 10-20 rounds up to as many rounds as my body feels like doing. The resting time or relaxation in between the exercises or the asana poses is at least 15-30 seconds up to a few minutes depending on what type of exercises or poses and also depending on how my body feels after the exercise or the asana pose. The final relaxation is as long as my body wants to be completely at rest.

For the leg lift exercises usually I do as many times as my body can do. Sometimes I do more, sometimes I do less. There’s no need to count how many times. It is not important how many times we can lift the legs up, and it’s not that every one can keep the legs completely straight nor can open the legs as wide as some people do, it’s fine. Everyone has a different body type, different physical limitation, and different flexibility and strength. If the lower back is not strong enough or there’s some back problems, then put the palms down side by side under the buttocks to support the lower back. If there’s some injuries or physical limitations that you cannot perform certain exercises, then don’t do it or make some adjustments. Even if your body cannot perform any of the exercises or poses, you still can practice yoga.

Love and peace has nothing to do with whether our body is strong and flexible or not.

Yoga is not determined by how strong and flexible our body is. Yoga is not determined by how many times we can lift the legs up, nor how long we can stand on our head, nor how far our fingers can touch the toes. It’s about developing non-attachment and accepting the reality as it is at the present moment.

It doesn’t mean that we are “bad” or “weak” in practicing yoga if we can only do 5 leg lifts, and it doesn’t mean that we are very “good” or “strong” in practicing yoga if we can do 200 leg lifts. Just do whatever your body can do at the present moment when you are doing it. Every time or every practice it might be different. Sometimes the body is more energetic and sometimes it is less energetic. Sometimes it is more flexible and sometimes it is less flexible. That is the nature of impermanence.

Learn to be comfortable in all the exercises, not struggling and not forcing our body to go beyond its limitation. Relaxed into all the poses and hold as long as you can comfortably. Slowly the body will build up strength and flexibility.

Even if the body still not strong or flexible to perform certain poses after many years of practice, it’s fine. That doesn’t determine that we are good or bad in practicing yoga.

Learn to accept the condition of our body as it is, and be comfortable with our body as it is at the present moment now. Not comparing ourselves with our own past experience. Not projecting into the future what we want our body to become. Let the result or the benefits come naturally. Allow the strength and flexibility to come naturally. Even though we don’t know what are the benefits from doing the exercises or not having any expectation from doing the exercises, the benefits will still be there. It won’t increase when we know about it or have expectation. It won’t decrease nor disappear when we don’t know about it nor not having any expectation. Not comparing with other people nor try to become somebody else that we are not.

Be comfortable with ourselves for who we are, what we are, how we are, where we are, what we are doing and not doing, what we can do and cannot do. There’s no craving nor aversion. There’s no craving to become more strong, more flexible, more happy, more wise, or more peaceful… Because “we” are not determined by all these qualities… We are eternal peace itself. We don’t become peaceful or unpeaceful, that impermanent changing “peacefulness” and “unpeacefulness” is just the impermanent state of the mind… We are not the mind, but we are aware of all the states of the mind. There’s no aversion towards what we are now, how we are now, where we are now, what we are doing or not doing, what we can do or cannot do.

Peace is always there in us. It never increase nor decrease. This peace is not determined nor conditioned by the impermanent condition of our body or the ability of our body to do this or that…

Just practice. Keep practice. No judgment. No comparison, No expectation. No craving. No aversion.

I didn’t edit the part 10 – Headstand. The first few minutes is just basic headstand without any variations. Usually in a video that demonstrates headstand, it only shows about the variations of headstand moving in motion. I didn’t edit it to show that it is important to stay in the headstand without any variations for as long as possible and comfortably without checking on the time. It is not the time that matters, but being able to stay in the pose comfortably for a long period of time without the idea of time, without changing the pose or posture. This can train the body and mind to be patient and to develop strong determination and will-power.

It is essential to stay in the headstand for a minimum of 5-15 minutes for getting the effects or benefits of performing headstand. At the beginning, one may stay in the headstand just for a few seconds, and then keep practice until one can stay up to 5 – 10 minutes. It doesn’t matter if someone still cannot perform headstand after many times of practice, or someone who has some health complications or physical injuries that don’t allow him or her to perform headstand, know that this doesn’t determine whether we can practice yoga or not, or whether we are practicing yoga or not.

Peace, compassion and selflessness is nothing to do with the ability of our physical body to perform the asana poses/exercises. Anyone whether can perform headstand or not, can stay in headstand for a few seconds or for a few minutes, is still practicing yoga when they have unconditional love and peace, when they are selfless and compassionate, when they know non-attachment, when they have self-control over their own thoughts, actions and speech.

After coming down from headstand, it is important to stay in child pose for a few moments and then rest in savasan for a few minutes and then followed with some post-headstand counter poses like shoulderstand, plough and fish. This can help to release any muscles tightness that arise during headstand, and to balance up the energy fields and to ensure maximum benefits.

Om shanti.

It is not necessary that a spiritual giant should have a muscular body. The greatest Jnani may also be tubercular patient. There is no contradiction between the two.

一个灵性修行圣者未必会有强壮健全的身体。最伟大的智者也可能是结核病患者。两者之间并没有出现任何的矛盾。

Swami Sivananda

Anyway, a real yogi doesn’t need to labeling or naming or calling himself or herself a “yogi”…

There’s no “good” or “bad” yogi if he or she is a real yogi…