Empowerment for women - International women's day

Someone suggested that I write something about empowerment for women.

First thing that came into my mind was, why do we condition and limit ourselves as "women" or "men"? Why do we limit ourselves as "women" or "men", and condition ourselves that we should behave, think and express ourselves as "women" or "men", and can only be empowered in certain ways just for "women", or just for "men"?

If we practice Yoga Vedanta teachings about namelessness and formlessness, or non-dualism, or non-separateness, or "all is one", in our everyday life, there will be none or less problems than we think we have now in the world that derives from the perception of separateness due to attachment and wrong identification with the qualities of names and forms.

We can just be "who we are" unconditioned by the different sexual characteristics or physical appearances. We can think or act or express ourselves freely without conditioning ourselves that we can only think or act or express ourselves in certain ways restricted by the different sexual characteristics.

This is not about denying our sexuality as women or men.

We are aware of our physical body having female or male sexual characteristics and it is conditioned to have certain particular functions according to respective genital organs that our body has. But, the capability of our mind to think or to believe, can be free without being restricted by the differences of the sexual aspects and appearances.

We can also be aware of, and be able to accept the fact that there are certain things that the female or male physical body can and cannot perform. Different genital organs have their own duties to be performed or to be carried out.

Other than these restrictions due to having specific genital organs in our physical body influencing the hormonal system as well as our emotions and feelings, we can be free to be "who we are" without being restricted by the different genital organs and physical appearance that generate the qualities of names and forms that categorize us into "women" or "men".

We acknowledge and respect our body as it is, but we do not identify ourselves with the physical body and condition ourselves as "women" or "men", as our true nature is without qualities of names and forms. We are who we are. we are not "women" nor "men". We might recognize or identify ourselves as a species called "human beings", and even this name and form about "being human beings" is not the truth of who we really are.

Once we are free from being conditioned by the differences of qualities of names and forms, we are who we are or what we are. We are not "human beings" nor "non-human beings". We are not "women" nor "men". We are not determined by all these qualities of names and forms. We are not being conditioned by how worldly minds believe how "human beings" should behave, nor how "women" or "men" should behave.

Once we let go of attachment towards the identification of "I am a woman or a man, and I should think, act or behave like what a woman or a man should think, or act, or behave, then naturally we are just who we are". We are free.

Only when we are totally free to be who we are and not being restricted as "women" or "men" or "human beings". The sense of separateness disappears. We do not isolate ourselves from what we think or believe that is different from us, that are not the same species or category like us.

We accept ourselves as we are, without the need of having competition or comparison between "women" and "women", or between "women" and "men".

We start to accept everyone as they are , not because they are "women" and they behave like "women" or "good women", or they are "men" and they behave like "men" or "good men".

We let go of expectation that we, or other people, as "women" or "men", should think, act or behave in certain particular ways according to the type of sexual organs our physical body has.

This allows us to be free to be who we are, not because we are being "human beings", or being "women", or being "men".

And so, there is no difference in terms of how to be truly confident or be truly happy in life between "women" and "men".

If we are ignorant about the truth of who we really are, and condition ourselves or limit ourselves as "this" or "that", then there is no difference between "women" and "men" when the mind is in a state of unhappiness or restlessness due to ignorance. When we are angry, we are the same. When we feel hurt and disappointed, we are the same. When we have fear and worry, we are the same.

We will be conditioned by thinking that we should think, act and express the way that we think or believe what a "good woman" or a "good man" should think, act and express, or else, we are "bad" or "not good" as "women" or "men"...

It doesn't matter whether we are human beings or non-human beings, women or men, young or old, healthy or unhealthy, rich or poor, educated or uneducated, having religion or not, or having different religions and beliefs, or having different cultural backgrounds or languages that we can understand and speak, or having different points of view and different ways of doing things, or having different nationalities, colours of skin, or body shapes, or sexual appearances, or having different lifestyles, personalities or characteristics, when come to being ignorant, we all are the same. When it comes to realizing the truth of things, it is the same. When we are in a state of happiness, or in a state of painful sorrow, it is the same.

By practicing Yoga Vedanta in life, we let go of what our mind is educated or informed about what worldly "success" or "happiness" or "meaningful life" means. We let go of what our mind is conditioned to believe or think what is "good and bad", "positive and negative", "happiness and suffering" etc, as the truth of things is that everything is just what it is. It is not something "good or bad", "positive or negative", "happy or suffering"...

When we realize the truth of things and are able to accept the reality of things as they are, without judging or categorizing them as "good or bad", "positive or negative", "happy or suffering", then we will not be affected, nor influenced, nor determined by the forever changing qualities of names and forms that our mind perceives and experiences from moment to moment, through the senses of what we see, hear, smell, taste, touch and think. We will not generate attachment towards the qualities of names and forms. There is no craving or clinging to what our mind used to believe or perceive as something "good", "positive" or "happy". There is no aversion towards what our mind used to believe or perceive as something "bad", "negative" and "suffering".

This is the state of non-duality, or namelessness and formlessness.

This is because real peace and happiness, or confidence is unconditional or unlimited. It doesn't come from the qualities of names and forms that are conditioned by impermanence, nor determined by the different appearances or conditions of the physical body or the things that we come in contact with.

Real peace and happiness or confidence is not attained from what we think or what we want to believe "success" or "achievement" means. We think that "success" or "achievement" has a similar meaning to peace, happiness and confidence, that if we attain the "achievement" or "success" that we want, we will be peaceful, happy and confident. We are conditioned that when we are able to do what we want to do, go where we want to go, be what we want to be, only then we will be peaceful, happy and confident. Or else, when our wishes or what we want to attain is not gratified, we will be not peaceful, not happy and not confident.

We also have different points of view about what is categorized as "achievement" and what is not. Some people take being successful in relationships as "achievement" in life. Some take being successful in career as "achievement" in life. Some take doing volunteer works as "achievement" in life. Some take accumulating wealth as "achievement" in life. Some take having a happy marriage or happy family as "achievement" in life. Some take having a "beautiful", "healthy", "strong and flexible" body or "fit" body as "achievement" in life... And so on.

There is nothing wrong with setting all these "objects" or "qualities" as goals that we want to achieve in life... But then we will be conditioned and limited by all these names and forms to be happy or not.

If we can let go of the conditioned way of thinking about what we are and how we should think and behave, then our confidence about ourselves will not be determined by nor come from whether we are "women" or "men", whether we are "good" or "not good" according to the standard that we categorize things into "good" and "not good", whether we are "successful" in life or not, or how we look, or what is our worldly image, or how many "achievements" we had attained, or how other people think of us or judge us as "this" or "that"...

We are limited by what our mind wants to believe things are. If we identify with the mind and associate with what our ego likes and doesn't like, then we will be determined by all these conditions that come from our own mind, to be happy or not, to be confident or not.

For example, we are educated, or told, or informed that having fair and smooth skin is "beautiful" in Asia, and if our skin is dark in colour and not smooth, then we are not "beautiful". If we are attached to what "beautiful" means in this commercial world of beauty products, then very naturally we will be attached to the term "beautiful", and want to look and feel "beautiful", then we will be determined by our skin colour and texture to determine whether we are "beautiful" or not. We will have very low self-esteem, be dissatisfied and unhappy if our physical body image and appearance does not fall into the category of being "fit and beautiful".

If we are free from this ignorance about what is "beautiful" and let go of the desire of looking forward to be "beautiful" whether it is to feel good about ourselves, or to get other people's attention, or for other people to like us, or love us, or to get support and acknowledgment from certain people or groups, and to feel confident and meaningful about ourselves, then we will be happy and confident as we are. We accept ourselves as we are, no matter whether we fall into the category of "beautiful" or not according to the worldly standard about qualities for being "beautiful". We don't need to be "beautiful". We are not "beautiful" nor "not beautiful". We are what we are, and we accept and love ourselves as we are.

True confidence is unconditional. When we know this true confidence, we can perform all our duties and responsibilities without fear and worry. We are not determined by "success" or "failure" to be happy or not. We can do our best in whatever we want to do, but without being affected nor determined by the result, or the fruit of our actions.

Real peace, happiness and confidence are not determined by whether we are "successful" in life or not, whether we achieve what we want to achieve or not, whether we can do what we want to do or not, whether we get what we want to get or not, whether we live in "good" conditions or not, whether our relationship with somebody is "good" or not... And so on.

Real peace, happiness and confidence are unconditional and unlimited. By knowing the truth of things and about ourselves we accept and love ourselves and other people as we are, as they are, without expecting ourselves to be what we want us to be, nor expect other people to be what we want them to be.

Be happy.

Additional notes :

Be yourself as you are...
You are naturally beautiful as you are...
Your beauty is beyond the look of the physical appearances...
You don't need to look like anyone else...
Nor do you need to hide your natural beauty with some additional coatings or accessories...

Love yourself by accepting yourself as you are, from within and without...
If you can't even love yourself as you are, then no one else can...

Beauty is beyond names and forms, colours and shapes, words and languages...

You'll see beauty in everyone and everything, when you see it in yourself just as you are...

Happy women's day...  

Want to help the world to be a better place? It starts with our own self...

I have just found out about today is World Peace Day...

May all beings have love and peace, and the world will be in peace...

 (Photos taken in Chiangmai from a painted wall beside the road)

We notice that there are many of us are very unhappy or depressed with the current situation in the world. We care for the world and want to help or make the world to become a better place for all beings to live in. We know that if the world is not in peace, there will be no peace in our own personal life as well. If the country is having problems, there is no peaceful condition for us to enjoy a good quality of life. If the world is having problems, it is difficult for us to be able to live in peace in anywhere of the world.

We want to have good and healthy living environment. We want peace and harmony among all beings disregard different nations, religions, believes and races. We want good, wise and selfless leaders to lead the world. We want all beings to respect and love and be kind to each other without anger, hatred, jealousy, violence and killings.

We also know that there are some people that don’t want the world to be in peace… Out of selfish intentions, they create disharmony and fear into the world. Some people just being very selfish not caring for the environment and damaging the environment consciously or unconsciously. Most of us might get very angry and frustrated with this. There’s nothing wrong to feel angry about this. But anger and hatred cannot stop this from happening. We should feel compassionate towards these people because they are being influenced or blinded by ignorance. They don’t have love, peace, compassion and wisdom in them. That’s why they are doing actions that are hurting other people and themselves.

Being upset, angry and hatred towards the bad situations that derive from wrong doings in the world now will not help the world to improve or to become better.

Anger and hatred cannot solve problems. They cannot remove negativity, anger and hatred that are existing in the world.

The only things that can stop ignorance, anger, hatred and violence, is compassion and wisdom. Only compassion and wisdom can help the world to change and evolve, to be peaceful.

This compassion and wisdom have to start with our own self. We need to realize compassion and wisdom in us. Then only we can spread compassion and wisdom to other beings, and share love and peace into the world.

If we ourselves are not compassionate, lack of wisdom, and are full of anger and hatred being disturbed by the “bad” happenings and “bad” people in the world, then how can we share love and peace with others and help the world to become a peaceful harmonious place, as we ourselves are not in peace?

If we don’t know how to take care ourselves and don’t know how to deal with our own mental and emotional tensions, then how can we take care of other beings or help others to be free from the mental and emotional tensions that contribute to the “bad” happenings in the world?

If we are full of negativity, how are we going to bring positivity and positive changes into the world?

Start with our own evolution. Love ourselves, be kind and compassionate towards our own self.

When we are compassionate towards ourselves, we won’t let ourselves to be over-powered by the impurities in our mind and be free from the influence of the selfish ego. All our actions are out of compassion and selflessness. Without intention to change the world, without expectation that the world will be changed, without discrimination of good or bad beings, wise or ignorant beings, we perform all actions that can be done to help the world to evolve. There is no anger and hatred. There is no disappointment and discontentment. There is no frustration and unhappiness.

Like the sun, the air, the water, the earth and the space. They give, provide and support all living beings and non-living beings to be exist in the universe. They perform their action of giving, providing and supporting unceasingly, selflessly, out of compassion, unlimitedly, unconditionally, without discrimination, without intention to give, they are giving all the time… Without expectation to benefit anyone or to receive anything in return, they just give, provide and support. It doesn’t matter if human beings are polluting the world, damaging the nature, and condemning the sun, the wind, the water and the earth for being too much or too little, they still continuously to give without anger, hatred and disappointment.

That is real compassion. Complete selfless. That is our true nature. Our true nature is selfless like the sun, the air, the water, the earth and the space, but we are being disconnected with this selflessness due to the veil of ignorance and the selfish ego. We become selfish and being influenced by all the impurities in the mind for us to act and react through thoughts, actions and speech.

All our actions are being influenced by the likes and dislikes, agreement and disagreement, craving and aversion that comes from the selfish and self-protective ego. And all these impure actions bring some consequences that are not necessary beneficial to anyone or as what we expected it to be.

In our true nature, there’s only selflessness and compassion, being free from the conditioned thinking mind, the limited intellect, the selfish ego, and be free from desires and ignorance. If all beings realize this true nature, being compassionate and wise, the world will be free from unnecessary and meaningless harmful wrong doings that come from human beings that are not happy, not peaceful and not satisfied due to ignorance and the wrong identification with the ego in the absence of love, peace, compassion and wisdom.

If we have love, peace, compassion and wisdom in us, we will know how to be happy and be at peace, will not be disturbed nor affected by the world, but at the same time we are aware of what is happening in the world. We know what is right, what is wrong but we are not being affected by neither of them. Out of compassion without selfish intention and expectation, we can perform many actions that need to be done and that can be done, to help other beings to realize the wisdom and compassion in them. But before that can happen, we ourselves need to be compassionate and wise. We ourselves must have love and are in peace. Then only we can share this compassion, wisdom, love and peace with other beings, and guide them to realize their true nature is love, peace, compassion and wisdom.

Only when we realize the wisdom and compassion in us, and start to reflect on our own thoughts, actions and speech, then we will have the awareness of what is right and what is wrong, what we should do and shouldn’t do. This justification of right and wrong, should do and shouldn’t do is coming from the wisdom within the true Self, and it is not coming from the limited and conditioned intellectual mind under the influence of the selfish ego, which is influenced by what the mind likes and doesn’t like, or what the mind thinks is good or not good, or what the mind agrees or disagrees with.

Knowledge that we studied from books or heard from somebody who told us or taught us since we were born until now, it’s not necessary absolutely true and correct. We were being manipulated or brain washed by so many informations that come from many impure sources.

Knowledge that will remove ignorance, anger, hatred, doubts, arrogance, jealousy, selfishness, discrimination, disharmony, violence, depression, greed, ill-will, fear and worry are true knowledge. Knowledge that will promote all these impurities are incorrect knowledge.

Knowledge and actions that are based on self-control (not being controlled or influenced by any influences that are other than ourselves and not trying to control others to be the way that we want them to be or what we think they should be), compassion (unconditional loving kindness) and selflessness (unselfish; not influenced by the ego) are pure knowledge and pure actions that cannot be judged by impure minds which are being conditioned or influenced by qualities of names and forms, selfish intention and expectation.

Some good people who love the world very much, “passionately” want to change the world, who “actively” want to help the world to become a better place, criticize those who focus on performing Sadhana spending their time meditating at a corner of the world, criticize them for sitting there doing nothing, didn’t go out to do something about the world’s problems, didn’t contribute anything to help to change the world…

The point is, when these meditator sitting there “doing nothing” is already contributing to the world as there is less a being generating negativity or harmful actions and vibrations into the world… The people who love the world “passionately” should be thankful for that.

While these meditator who seem like doing nothing, they are indeed generous contributors towards world peace, as they illuminate positive vibrations and energy of love and peace into the world…

If we don’t like what is happening in the world, and want to perform actions trying to change the situation or the condition of the world, this is very good. We should keep it up and do our best to help the world to improve, to be a better place…

But if at the same time, we are being proud and arrogant about ourselves being “good human being” or “responsible citizen of the world”, and start criticizing those who we “believe” and “think” that they don’t do anything to help the world, or they don’t contribute to a better world, and judging them as not “good human beings” or not “responsible citizen of the world”, such like “those who meditate sitting there doing nothing”, then we are not really helping the world, as we generate so much negative vibrations and energy into the world, just by being so proud and arrogant about ourselves and our “actions” that “want to change the world to be a better place”…

If we can perform all our “loving kindness” actions to help the world to be a better place without being proud and arrogant about ourselves, without criticizing those who “seem like” or “look like” they don’t contribute anything, without expecting other people will also be like us, to do what we do according to what we believe is right and good, and not doing what we don’t do according to what we believe is wrong and bad, then this is Yoga. This is selflessness and compassion…

Without peace, selflessness, compassion and wisdom in ourselves, even though we perform lots of actions try to help the world to become a better place, it doesn’t necessary means that we didn’t cause any destructions or didn’t generate negative vibrations or energy into the world…

If we want to help the world, please help ourselves first. Rise above ignorance, anger, hatred, selfishness, expectation, craving and aversion. Without being affected by what is happening in the world, out of compassion, selflessly we give and share love, peace, compassion and wisdom to every beings without fear and worry, without frustration and expectation, without attachment to our actions and the fruit of actions.

Be peaceful.

Be happy.